Habit #1- Fighting is Communicating.
When you see anger, you see passion. People don't fight about stuff they don't care about.
Anger rarely feels good, but at least you know you're talking about stuff that matters. If you want to know what is meaningful to someone, look at what they are willing to fight for.
If you can observe what is important to someone else without deflecting it or defending yourself, you can see their passion and values.
Passion is likely the thing that brought you together in the first place. It's also what can transform your relationship once you realize you want the same things; you just disagree on how to get there.
FEEL-GOOD HABIT
Fight well. Express your perspective and listen. Look beyond the words (and who did what) and grasp the meaning in someone's terms.
What do they care about? Now find common ground.
Habit #2- You can only experience your life in the present moment.
Putting thoughts to things will turn ideas into future goals. Thoughts search through memories for evidence to support those ideas.
None of this is now.
Thoughts can’t get you to the same place feelings can. You feel insight in the present moment.
Everything unfolds in the present moment. Your assessments and thoughts cause you to dig around in the past and project ideas onto the future.
You feel inner wisdom. The way to know you’re in the moment is to take the time to feel it. It will always feel good.
If it feels bad or neutral, you're assessing it ( past/future), not feeling it now.
FEEL-GOOD HABIT
Instead of thinking about things you want in the future, feel what it would be like to have them now.
Habit #3- You Can't Have What You Don't Believe In.
If you don’t believe you’ll find a great job, you won’t. If you don’t believe you’ll find a great spouse, you won’t. It’s about the belief in you, not your surrounding circumstances.
There are no circumstances that can compensate for a lack of belief.
FEEL-GOOD HABIT
Think about something you want but can’t seem to get. Now stop looking for it and assume you have it.
If you want to find something, get your mindset straight first. Stop looking outside yourself and believe in yourself instead.
Habit #4-You Live Your Life Through your Feelings, not your Goals.
What I’ve learned most from Blissing Out is this: You live your life through feelings, not goals.
Life is meant to be experienced, felt and lived right now, not analyzed and sorted into future piles of good and bad.
Life is not a future goal but a current feeling inside you. When you feel good, this is how you know you're living your life—living in it, not analyzing it.
When you feel good, you feel life inside you right now; you don’t pick it apart to assess its future value.
If this doesn’t make sense to you, stop thinking about it and feel good about something instead. You will feel the difference.
FEEL- GOOD HABIT
Bliss Out. It will all make sense.